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March 1/2 2013– Adar 20 5773 Parshat Ki Tissa
Alone with God
In this week’s Torah portion we have one of the more pathetic events in Jewish history – the building of the Golden Calf. Right on the heels of the most amazing and nation-altering event of the Ten Commandments comes this low point. So much so that God is ready to wipe out the entire nation and start over with just Moshe.
Moshe gets to work defending the Jewish people not only from annihilation but beyond and is able to successfully re-establish the relationship between God and the Jewish people and make it whole again.
When Moshe was pleading for the Jews, the Torah gives us a peek and a listen into the private conversations that took place back atop Mount Sinai between Moshe and God. It wasn’t all, “Ah, c’mon, God, you know how stiff-necked these Jews are … give ‘em a break!” No, actually there were some pretty, pretty … pretty interesting things being discussed.
Moshe puts it all on the line and raises a number of issues. He claims that although God has told him that he is to get assistance with the Jewish people, he still is not clear how that will come about. According to Rashi, Moshe implies that an angel won’t cut it as a guide it and he will only be satisfied if God Himself is with the people and leads them.
Moshe then gets down to some more fundamental issues and uses those private moments with the Almighty to inquire about a few things that have been bothering him for some time.
When Moshe says, “Make known to me Your ways” (Ex. 33:13) he is raising the most difficult theological issue that we contend with: Reward and Punishment, why bad things happen to good people, why we see evil people prosper and the like. According to tradition it is not clear whether Moshe even received an answer to this all-important and nettlesome issue that has plagued mankind in every era and place.
But then Moshe takes the discussion even further. “Show me Your Glory” (Ex.33:18) is Moshe’s request to see God’s essence and here God says no dice, “You cannot see My face because man cannot see Me and still live.” (Ex. 33:20)
What is a bit curious is why it took this abysmal event to give Moshe the courage to finally address these issues? Why wait for this point of anger and hostility between God and the Jewish people to broach some very intense theological issues?
In fact the two are inextricable linked. The Golden Calf led to some head scratching and reassessment between God and Moshe and the Jewish people.
When a couple has a falling out, a breach in the relationship, a rupture of some sort – in order for them to repair that relationship they need to dig a bit deeper into themselves than they ever have before. They need to look inside to discover a new layer of what makes them tick, what they expect of each other, what they are really made of and what their dreams, goals and aspirations are all about. Failings in any relationship are an indication of something that has gone and been going wrong for some time that has now come to a head. And once that failing is actualized and made evident, each party needs to do some serious introspection of their essence to re-evaluate who they are and what their future holds.
This is in a sense what Moishe was doing. He was having a very private and intimate confrontation with God about the sad reality that something is very wrong and needs to be corrected between Him and the Jewish people. Moshe came to the realization that he cannot go forward until he has a much better understanding of who and what God is all about, how He operates, what His plan is for His ongoing relationship with the Jewish
people (an angel rep was not satisfactory in Moshe’s estimation) and how exactly He plans to deal with His people in particular and mankind in general.
“Who are you really, God and how do You work?” is what Moshe needed to know. He needed to peel away the heretofore unforeseen layers so he could have a better understanding of where they stood and where they were going. The failure as expressed by the Golden Calf was a golden opportunity for Moshe to find that out.
It is the intimate moments after crisis when a couple reaches deep inside to discover a place that they now need to be and has never been broached before. These were the moments that Moshe shared with God and that we must revisit to get our relationship with Him back on solid ground.
Come up to meet you, tell you I’m sorry
You don’t know how lovely you are
I had to find you, tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart
Tell me your secrets
And ask me your questions
Oh let’s go back to the start
– Coldplay
Rabbi Tzvi Nightingale
Aish South Florida